My startup was my family — until it wasn’t

Can you build a family and a business at the same time? In a new bi-monthly column, founder-father Varun Bhanot offers a candid behind-the scenes look at the wins and the whines of being a “Startup Daddy” today.

I have been called Startup Daddy in part because I run a business and partly because I became a dad. Surfing through life as a challenging founder and father has made me realise what “family” means, and what it’s about, especially in the world of startups.

Previously, I have heard a phrase many times before that goes, “Oh, we are not just a team, we are a family here.” And while this statement is often well-meaning, I have grown increasingly wary of that comparison.

Let’s just remind ourselves that families are truly unconditional. Startups, by their founding nature, aren’t.

In one of our early ventures, we built a tight-knit team. We have celebrated birthdays, pulled all-nighters together, and even taken a weekend retreat. It felt like a family, until it didn’t.

When you had to let go of someone due to their negligible performance, it wasn’t just hard, but it felt like a good betrayal, apart from being vengeance. Why so? Because we have crossed certain blurry lines. We sold them a family, not a workplace, to pitch in their ideas.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

Agility doesn’t mean burnout. I remember watching a junior developer working 14 hours a day, thinking it was expected because “Oh, isn’t that what family is about?” We didn’t ask much, but we didn’t stop. That’s completely on us.

What’s my take on it?

Startups only work best when people feel valued, safe, and secure. Not purely obligated by family guilt. I would rather aim for a highly trust-based team where people can thrive, achieve, agree, disagree, and even leave without feeling like they are being walked out on by a family.

About Varun Bhanot

Varun Bhanot is Co-founder and CEO of MAGIC AI, the cutting-edge AI mirror that makes high-quality fitness coaching more accessible. Under his leadership, MAGIC AI has raised $5 million in venture funding and earned multiple industry accolades — including being named one of TIME’s Best Inventions of 2024. As a new father as well as founder, Varun shares candid insights on balancing parenting and entrepreneurship in his bi-monthly guest column, Startup Daddy.

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