Startup Daddy goes to South Korea: a time zone and a toddler away

Last week, I boarded a plane to South Korea. It was my first international business trip since becoming a dad. I felt a strange sting. I wasn’t just leaving home, but a tiny human being who had become the centre of my existence.

A fourteen-hour flight seemed too long. The fact that my destination had a flipped time zone made me fret that keeping in touch would be difficult.

Travelling back and forth is simply a logistical dilemma for any founder. You pack, fly, pitch, meet, fly back with jet lag getting at you. The business deal you cracked is its own reward. Now that I also hold the title of a dad, though, it has changed everything. I kept looking at the gate thinking, is it worth it?

Still, building a startup from scratch is what drives me, and therefore, this trip was not to be missed. It afforded me an opportunity I had been looking for quite some time – potential for big conversations and avenues to connect with potential partners. But I had to lose a chance for bedtime stories, silly giggles, and early morning wake-up calls that start with a tiny hand poking my face.

It was a mixed bag of feelings – excitement clouded by heartbreak. Hustling for your company is a habit that comes naturally to any aspiring founder, but I realised how hard it is to walk away from a kid’s routine, even for a few days.

I had a jam-packed routine back in South Korea, leaving me little time to think about anything else. I did all I was supposed to do – attend meetings, go for dinners, followed by the late-night strategy sessions. However, as night struck and the noise died down with no one around, I did something that made me truly happy. I watched a video of my toddler dancing around and smiling in pure innocence, and for some time, I forgot all about the rules of business.

I know for sure that being a founder is about sacrifice. Yet parenthood, too, calls for sacrifices. When those two roles clash, this is inevitable as each demands a greater portion of one’s time, energies, and even love. The fact that it is so difficult to reconcile the two makes one despair.

There’s no clear-cut lesson in this. I didn’t come back with some revolutionary idea about how to get the best of both worlds without compromising either. Instead, I came back with a new perspective. I came to realise that it worked as a trade-off, where one would come at the expense of the other.

Showing up for your company means denying yourself precious moments with family. Similarly, devoting time to your family means giving up on a portion of the profit that you so covet.

To be candid, I want to fulfil both my responsibilities with all my heart so I don’t have to regret later. I want my child to grow up knowing that I was no superhuman and that I didn’t always get the balance right, but that I never shied away from trying.

I literally counted the days until my departure, and it finally happened. The return home was an emotional rollercoaster, filled with hugs, kisses, and tears of joy. On one hand, I felt relieved about coming back with a successful deal, and on the other, there was this guilt of missing so many days with my kid.

Founders often shy away from discussing emotions. We’re considered to be in a constant tug of war between the business we’re anxiously building, and the life we’re shaping at home. But no matter how many benchmarks we hit, it would cease to be meaningful if we didn’t have a family to share and celebrate our wins with.

About Varun Bhanot

Varun Bhanot is Co-founder and CEO of MAGIC AI, the cutting-edge AI mirror that makes high-quality fitness coaching more accessible. Under his leadership, MAGIC AI has raised $5 million in venture funding and earned multiple industry accolades — including being named one of TIME’s Best Inventions of 2024. As a new father as well as founder, Varun shares candid insights on balancing parenting and entrepreneurship in his bi-monthly guest column, Startup Daddy.

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